The Biological Clock
by Jean Cooper
Summary: New Life contest entry. I was just perfectly fine with the way our lives were now. Why the hell should we change it? Strong T for language.
1. Chapter 1

**This is my entry for the New Life Contest. It was originally going to be a stand alone, but I ended up stretching it into a three shot. This first bit is slightly humorous. Strong T rating I suppose since there are mentions to methods of birth control that don't necessarily work. So keep that in mind- don't try this at home (super disclaimer that fan fiction is not a substitute for sex ed class- and if that offeneded anyone this was meant to be a joke )**

**Special thanks to sugarapplesweet for holding my hand through this whole ordeal- as I wasn't sure if this was worth publishing or not. You guys can thank her for pushing me to get this done by deadline time. ( you can also thank her for the slightly humorous ending ;) )**

**I don't own Harvest Moon**

* * *

I relaxed against the mattress, pulling the down comforter up over my legs and tossing some of it on my wife as she reached over to her side, switching off the bedside lamp. The room was suddenly consumed by darkness, and I felt Claire turn to me, her lips pecking my cheek quickly before she rolled over with her back to me. I frowned some, tucking one arm under my pillow and resting the other on my chest. I decided to let it go. I was damn tired from work today, and I wasn't in the mood to play twenty questions with the woman. When whatever was on her mind bothered her enough she would tell me what was wrong. Five years of marriage tended to make you gain some type of patience with your partner, even if you didn't have that much to begin with.

"Gray…"

I inwardly groaned, realizing that despite me leaving the issue alone, she obviously was going to talk with me about it tonight. I grunted in response, letting her know I was still conscious, and I could feel her shift towards me. She remained silent for a few minutes, which didn't bother me all that much since I would probably drift off to sleep if she didn't speak up soon, and I began to yawn.

"I want to have a baby."

I felt my eyes jolt open I began to cough, choking on the yawn that had been escaping me and bolting up some. My hand reached over her and I found the lamp switch, cutting it on and wincing at the sudden light that filled the room.

"W-What?!" I managed out, my chest heaving as I looked down at my wife, her form curled up in the bed next to me. She didn't seem annoyed by my reaction, and she closed her eyes tightly and repeated herself, the words barely a whisper.

"I want to have a baby," her small hand came up to her face in a poor attempt to hide her flushing face. I blinked down at her, my mouth opening and shutting several times before I shook my head in an attempt to gain back some composure and stop looking like a damn fish.

"What brought this on all of a sudden?" I muttered out, scratching the back of my hatless head and suddenly wishing I had it to cover my own reddening face.

"Nothing really…I just…want one. Don't you?" she murmured out, her eyes meeting mine and I felt myself scowl.

"Not right now," I muttered, and that evidently was the closest thing to the wrong answer I could have given her. She shot me a stern glare before she pushed away from me, rolled over and turned the light off, literally giving me the cold shoulder. I rolled my eyes and reached back over, flipping the light back on. "I didn't mean it that way," I muttered out, pinching the bridge of my nose in frustration.

"Then exactly how did you mean it?"

"I just meant…that why all of a sudden? I mean, aren't you happy with the way we are right now?" I began to try to explain my case, and could see by the look on her face that I was putting my foot deeper and deeper

"Don't you want more? To start a family?" Maybe it was sleep deprivation or maybe the deep sinking feeling I suddenly got in my gut, but I suddenly snapped on her.

"No I don't. I just fine with the way things are now. What the hell would you want to screw them up?" I snapped out, the small part of my brain that was supposed to filter my thoughts from escaping my mouth evidently out to lunch at this time. I felt that sinking feeling in my gut tighten as my wife's face showed the shock and then the hurt from my outburst.

"Just…just go to bed. I'm sorry I brought it up," she snapped back, reaching over and turning the light back out. I could feel her move over to the edge of our bed, unwilling even be near my body heat at this time. I sighed and pushed my hair back in frustration, knowing that no amount of apologizing or lobbying on my behalf would get me back into her good graces tonight.

I threw the covers angrily off from me and rolled out of bed, grabbing my pants and shirt from the chair next to the bed. I'd gotten dressed enough early in the morning before Claire awoke that I could do it in the dark with no problems. I yanked my boots on angrily over my sockless feet and left the house without another word.

I let out a frustrated growl as I excited out property, taking a sharp right and kicking any innocent stones in the path out of it as I shoved my hands in my pants pockets. Even though it was nearly 10 at night the heat from the earlier summer day was near sweltering, and the humidity was horrible, making my skin feel clammy and my body feel like I should take yet another shower.

"What the hell has gotten into that woman?" I muttered to myself as I passed by the Poultry Farm, hearing the domestic quarrel between Rick and his wife. I snorted as I kept walking, trying hard not to chuckle as Karen demanded to know exactly why she shouldn't be able to have a few glasses of wine when she was six months pregnant.

And somewhere between Ricks screaming that it wasn't healthy for the baby and coming upon Yodel Ranch I stopped as a sudden realization hit me. Claire was the only woman in Mineral Town not expecting or already raising a child. We were the only married couple to not have a baby. I went to pull my hat down, only to realize I had forgotten it and muttered under my breath as I continued walking.

"Goddamn it," I began, opting to run my long fingers through my red hair and yank on it instead. "She just needs to understand that we don't have to be like everyone else. Just because they all have kids…" I trailed off there as I realized I had come to an all too familiar place. Deciding that it was just fate, I pulled the doors to the inn open and saw the regular drinkers present, minus one very pregnant Karen. Seeing Kai perched on a bar stool staring down at his mug of beer, I couldn't help but to trudge over and plop down next to him.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, cutting his eyes lazily over to me and sipping on his frothy beer. I shrugged and jerked my thumb to Kai's mug when Doug came up to take my order. I opted to stay silent till I got my own mug of beer, then took a big gulp before answering.

"Me and Claire had a row," I offered, my eyes shutting as I felt the beer hit my stomach. It wasn't wise to drink on an empty stomach, but I didn't plan on getting wasted. Just a beer or two then I would go home. Claire would be asleep by then and I could slip back into bed and sleep for a bit before work. Then when I came home we could talk about this baby issue civilly.

"Join the club," Kai snorted out, taking a small sip of his beer and smirking at me. "We've got awesome purple jackets and little patches. They read 'In the dog house.'"

"Sounds like a club I don't particularly wish to join," came a low quiet voice as Tim set down on the opposite side of Kai, ordering a glass of wine and a dinner.

"What brings you here then?" I asked, taking a big swig of my own beer, and beginning to welcome a familiar warming sensation through my body as I realized the whole mug was now gone. I didn't have to much time to mourn as Doug set another mug in front of me.

"Elli is in bed," he replied simply, drumming his fingers over the counter lazily as he grinned stupidly at nothing in particular. "Sonya finally started sleeping through the night, so I was granted this outing." I blinked at the doctor and then felt my eyebrows furrow as I thought it over.

"Did Claire come by to see Elli today?" I asked, somewhat irritably.

"I believe so, why?" Tim replied, evidently sensing my brief moment of hostility. I remained silent and stared at my beer for a moment before shaking my head and grabbing it, chugging the whole thing.

It was just so out of the blue for Claire to bring this up. A few seasons back- before Mineral Town had been crawling with babies everything was just fine. I was happy, and so was Claire. But now all of a sudden the way we were living our lives- child free- wasn't enough for my dear wife. It wasn't that…I didn't want kids. But…well it was just so sudden. When we had first got married, Claire and I had discussed it briefly, deciding that with me still in training it would be difficult to raise a child. Plus Claire was busy on the farm all the time- she didn't have to time to dote on a helpless infant. Maybe things had changed since then. A few years back I had for the most part taken over the forge- and Claire had managed to find more time to spend by herself or at her leisure than before. But…we had just never brought the topic up again. And I was perfectly fine with the way things were now.

"My wife…seems to have contracted a case of baby fever," I finally offered, happily taking the fresh mug of beer offered to me and nursing it as if it would help my conscious feel any better. It wasn't like Claire was being unreasonable with wanting a kid. I mean that is what women did- nurtured and that crap. I heard Kai give out a bitter chuckle and he grabbed my shoulder, polishing off his own beer and slamming the mug down hard on the counter.

"Let me give you some advice Gray. Pull out," he muttered, causing Tim to shoot him a disproving glare. I didn't say anything right away, and Kai took that as his queue to continue. "Now I love my son, I really do. But that kid hates me with a passion. Every time he sees me lay a hand on Popuri he throws a tantrum and screams till I leave the room," He began, propping his elbows up on the counter and holding his head up lazily. "When Kevin was born our whole relationship changed. We fought more, she spent less time with me, and sex completely stopped- as if the six months after she felt she was to big to do anything weren't bad enough," he cut his eyes at me, looking for the most part like what I presumed was a starving man. "and then to top that off for the first four months after Kevin was born she was just too tired."

I blinked at the man, nursing his beer and seemingly happy to polish off another before returning to his ranting. But already the idea of a kid being in the picture and taking my wife away from me was a deal breaker. I was a selfish guy by nature, and I didn't see Claire often enough now as it was.

"You have no idea how incredibly selfish you sound right now, do you?" Tim interjected, opting to pick up a fork full of his pasta based dish and chew on it thoughtfully. Kai stiffened at this comment and jerked his head towards Tim as if he was offended.

"It's not just that," he protested, but couldn't seem to think of anything else to say at the moment, his mental processing sluggish due to the effects of the alcohol.

"I think you are forgetting the more important parts of parenthood- the most important part of being a father- and a husband," Tim deadpanned after swallowing his food. He turned some so he could look at Kai and me, a disproving glance in my direction before he cleared his throat.

"When you get married," he began, his eyes on me the entire time he spoke. "You agree that you and your wife are now a new family. That it is your duty to be there for one another- in sickness and in health. You agree that you will do your best to make her happy, and she will do the same for you. Most of the time that usually follows up with the news of pregnancy, which with the exception of you, seems to be the normal occurrence here in Mineral Town." He took a deep breath as he continued, holding my gaze.

"Nothing in this world compares to the feeling of pride you feel when you watch your wife grow with your child in her. I never felt as happy as I did when I felt Sonya kick for the first time, and when I heard her heart beat during the sonogram. And I didn't think I ever could feel happier until she was born and I was able to hold her for the first time." He shifted his stern gaze over to Kai and narrowed his eyes, causing the tan man to fidget on his bar stool.

"When your family expands, the responsibility of raising a child is not laid directly on the mother. If your wife feels this way, then she takes it out on you since she feels you are not doing your share to help her care for the life you helped bring into this world. It doesn't help her feelings of irritability or resentment if her husband can only think of his selfish needs," he offered as he stirred his food with his fork. He hummed as he thought something over, a small smirk playing on his lips. "You would probably work wonders for your marriage if you would offer to watch your son for a day and give your wife some time to herself."

"Way to tell him Dr. Phil," a high pitched giggle chimed in. I looked over Tim's shoulder and saw Ann standing there, her hand resting on the counter as she leaned lazily to the side, a large bright smile on her face. She pushed some of her red hair over her shoulder and gave us both a pitiful look. "You two don't deserve your wives. You," she began, her long finger pointing at Kai as she glared at him. "are to self centered to have become a father. And you," her finger shifted to me as her glare faltered some "are so oblivious to your wife's feelings that it's amazing you even managed to get married in the first place."

"Now Ann, that isn't true. I'll have you know that I love being a father. Even if…Kevin loves Popuri more than me," Kai muttered bitterly, rubbing his temple.

"Are you jealous of your son or your wife?" Tim asked, one eyebrow rose curiously at the tan man.

"Neither…I just…Kevin said his first word today. And…and my mom told me that most kids say dada first. And…And he said mama," Kai took a deep breath and buried his head in his hands. "He really does hate me you know. He screams every time Popuri hands him to me. It's not that I don't want to help…" he began, slightly panicked as he looked at Tim and Ann, trying to explain.

"Kevin can probably pick up on your frustration, and that makes him more nervous to be around you. Be more confident in yourself you idiot," Ann muttered, shaking her head and crossing her arms over her chest. "Cliff had the same problem with Johnny. Johnny would scream every time Cliff held him because he could tell Cliff was nervous. Babies pick up on those things."

"You…you really think so?" Kai mumbled, looking up at Ann with what appeared to be a glimmer of hope. Ann nodded and Kai returned the gesture, standing up wobbly on his feet and balancing with the counter. "Well…if…if you'll all excuse me, it seems…I have someplace else I'm needed tonight," he muttered, stumbling towards and out the door.

"Someone should have taken parenting classes in the city," Tim commented as he finally finished his dinner, now turning his attention on me. I blinked and looked back between him and Ann, suddenly feeling very nervous.

"You ever hear of a biological clock Gray?" Ann asked thoughtfully, taking Kai's seat and pinning me under her stern glare. I gave a stiff nod and she continued. "Well when a woman gets to be Claire's age- and all her friends are having kids, she tends to hear her own start ticking. And with every day the ticks get father away from the tocks."

"Claire and I have plenty of time to have kids. She's only 28," I replied, opting to nurse my beer than try to out glare Ann.

"At age 30 only 75 percent of women trying to conceive will do so within a year. At age 35 that drops to 66 percent," Tim offered, propping his head up lazily as he also seemed to examine me.

"We still have plenty of time," I insisted as I went to take another sip of my beer, only to have a small hand shove the mug roughly back to the counter and then that same hand grip my chin and pull me roughly back in the direction of a seemingly irate redhead.

"Are you aware that your wife believes that she is incapable of having children?" Ann muttered out lowly. I let the words sink in for a moment before my eyes widened in understanding.

"It could just as easily be him you know?" Tim chimed in, once again drumming his fingers on the counter. "He could have abnormally shaped sperm or a low sperm count. That would explain why they haven't been able to conceive."

"I do not! Nothing is wrong with my stuff!" I insisted, feeling as if someone might have well had taken a swing at my goods. Nothing was wrong with me.

"Nothing is wrong with either one of them. Unfortunately as Claire's best friend I know more about Gray's sex life than I would ever like to know. About 90 percent of the time he just pulls out," I felt my face flush bright red and stood up, clearly ticked off and embarrassed.

"You just…mind your own business."

"I would if you could mind to yours. But seeing as how your wife was in tears in here earlier today, I have to give you something to work with," Ann said, as if I was the one irritating her.

"C-Claire was…crying?" I mumbled out, feeling an all too familiar sensation fill me as it did every time I heard those words. Ann nodded and closed her eyes as she thought about it.

"She was. She…she thought there was a chance that she was pregnant, and when she found out she wasn't…" she trailed off there, a frown tugging at the corners of her lips. "I mean I told her it was probably for the best, and that she needed to discuss it with you. But obviously that didn't go over the way it was supposed to."

"But….but I don't think I'm ready to be a father," I sighed out, my shoulders slumping as I closed my own eyes. "I barely make a passable husband. I can barely make Claire happy, let alone another human being. I've no idea what kind of father I'll make…"

"And you won't know until you give yourself the chance. There is no amount of self searching that can answer that for you until you have a child of your own," Tim interrupted, standing up and laying some money on the counter. "For what it's worth I believe you would be a wonderful father, because you are the type of person who gives his all to something. And that is all anyone can ask from you Gray. Claire realizes that, and I'm sure she will be happy when you do as well." I blinked at the man, his words replaying in my head long after he had walked off, leaving me alone with Ann. After some time I returned my attention to my half full beer, seeing my reflection in the now froth less brew. I shook my head and pushed the mug away, standing up.

"I'm going home," I stated firmly, the room spinning slightly before steadying. I took a deep breath and made my way out of the inn and back into the less sweltering but still extremely humid night air.

I walked slowly on the trip back to the house, the pros and cons of what I had been told weighing on my mind. But there was more to it than that. I hadn't exactly had the best role model for a father growing up. Gramps had raised me since I was about nine, so he was the closest thing to a father I had. And Goddess that scared the hell out of me. Because even though the man was family and I loved him, I still thought he was a miserable human being and at times- especially when I was younger loathed the thought of being around him. The idea of my offspring thinking that about me was enough to make me not want to reproduce. If the people…the family I loved couldn't love me back …

"Damn it," I muttered under my breath when I found the house door locked. I pulled my keys out of my pocket, fumbling through the three that were all the same damn color under the moonlight. I stopped on the longer of the three, a ghost of a smile making its way to my face. Maybe tomorrow I should call Mary, and ask her opinion. But I already knew the bulk of her answer would be to use this key and go into the library and look in the section of books that pertained to parenthood. It was times like this that I really missed the woman.

I finally managed to get into my house and felt my smile drop at the vision of my wife huddled alone in the middle of the large bed, clinging to the pillow that belonged to me in her sleep. I knew her well enough to know she had probably spent a decent amount of time punching my pillow before she clung it to her and fell asleep like she was now. I also knew that after that small burst of anger diminished that there were more than likely enough tears to fall that made me feel like I should spend the next season making up to her.

I fumbled with my belt buckle and let my pants drop to the ground, nearly tripping on them as I stepped out of them. I quietly made my way to the bed, easing in on the side that belonged to Claire and softly stroking her hair. She stirred some, and after a moment her body shifted and turned towards me.

"I'm sorry," I whispered out, laying in the bed and dropping a light kiss on her cheek. She didn't say anything, and I didn't know if she was awake or not yet, but I continued on anyway. "It's not that I don't want to you know? It's more…hell I don't know Claire. What if the kid hates me? What if I turn into my grandfather?" I murmured out, my eyes becoming distant.

"It's hard work…and time consuming. Kids take up a lot of time, especially yours. I barely get to be with you as it is, and…" I trailed off, allowing my arm to slip over her body and my hand to rest in the middle of her back. I pulled her more to me and let out a sigh.

"You know…if it helps you, you can think of it as… if I have a baby- a part of you is always with me. That way…we're never apart." I blinked down at what I presumed was Claire's face, tucking her head under my chin and feeling her breath splaying at the base of my neck and smiling some.

"It's confusing really. I want you to be happy, and…I would love to watch you have our baby. But at the same time…I just can't be happy. Knowing that right now I'm doing my best and being a husband and barely passing. I don't want to come home to two disappointed faces…"

"You've been drinking," she commented dryly, but at the same time made no attempt to push away from me. "You're never this talkative without alcohol in your system," she muttered more to herself than to me, her small hand resting on the back of my neck and massaging the muscles soothingly. I closed my eyes, humming in response to her statement.

"Gray…I love you," she murmured out, pressing her lips against my neck and nuzzling me. I sighed in response, the alcohol and the neck rub making me drowsy. "I know you try your best, and I know that everything you do is for us, for our family. I think…that if we had a child that you would be a wonderful father. You would be strong and protect us, support us. You would be encouraging to our child, because it was something that you rarely got. You would do your best- to not do the things that hurt you growing up. Because you are a good man."

I groggily opened my eyes, my grip on the woman tightening more as I buried my face in her hair, chuckling some at her words. Maybe she was delusional- but maybe she was right. Even if we couldn't have kids…

"Nothing is wrong with you, you know? And nothing is wrong with my stuff either," I muttered the last part out darkly, feeling my temper flare slightly despite the fact that I was nearing unconsciousness. "I'll prove it to that guy too. Tomorrow…" I added through a yawn, snuggling more comfortably into the bed. I smiled when I heard Claire's response, confusion lacing her voice as I felt her head move back and forth slightly against me before she stilled.

"I don't think I even want to know what you're talking about."


	2. Chapter 2

I locked the door to the forge at four o'clock like I always did, my grandfather counting down his drawer as if we had made a large amount if sales today. Granted Kai had come in to pick up his Mother's day present for Popuri- a nice ring with their son's birthstone in the setting- just before closing. I'm sure that she would be more than pleased with it. Everything that Kai ever gave her she treasured more than life itself.

Kai seemed to be on a different note this year, embracing his father hood and his duty to watch over his now toddling son. If I hadn't have heard it from his own mouth about a year ago I never would have believed anyone who told me how he had felt. But Kai seemed to have taken Tim's words of wisdom to heart and things were a lot better. As a matter of fact, far from screaming every time he saw him- Kevin was damn near inseparable from his father now. He was getting so big too; I couldn't believe that toddler had been the pudgy baby that I had seen at the end of last summer.

"So when can I expect news of a pending great-grandchild from you?" I heard Gramps say, a hint of amusement to his voice. I balked some, my grip on the tools I was putting away tightening as I took a deep breath. After all, Grandpa didn't know about what I had been going through at home the last year. It wasn't like my wife's and my failed attempts of conception were idle office banter. And work was the only sanctuary I had left from sinking pit of depression that had grown in my home.

"I…I don't know. I mean…we…we were trying but…" I managed out, my voice strained as I forced the words out. I found that I couldn't finish the sentence and closed my eyes painfully.

Claire had been trying her best to handle everything but every month she had to drop that negative pregnancy test into the bathroom trash can she seemed to become a little more withdrawn. And it was killing me.

I didn't know what I could do to make her understand that it wasn't her fault. And I had tried to explain that even if we wanted to have a baby that there were some people in this world that for some reason couldn't have one. That particular conversation hadn't ended on the note I thought it would. I had thought maybe it would help her understand that it just might not be what fate had chosen for us. But I had ended up comforting a sobbing woman, and I think that instead of giving her strength like I had intended that I had done the opposite.

I had broken her….and she had given up.

The past two months there had been no awkward conversations about new methods. No magazine issues offering new positions or schedules and that sort of thing. She hadn't even opened her new box of EPTs and the subject had for the most part been dropped completely. The only time she even brought up children in the last two months was to inform me that we would be taking a certain couples child for the night. We had watched Sonya the most, as she was the most well behaved child and the least mobile. Johnny had also stayed a few nights, but the toddler didn't particularly care for the chickens in the yard- and screamed when he saw them. We were supposed to take Kevin and Rod for Mother's Day to give Popuri and Kai, and Karen and Rick some time to spend together. I personally felt like this was not the best idea in the world, seeing as how Claire had not been herself lately- but Claire had blown my concerns off.

"I see," My grandfather's voice brought me out of my thoughts as he stroked his beard thoughtfully, a sympathetic expression on his face. He didn't say anything for a moment, and then he jerked his thumb towards the door. "Go be with your wife. I'll finish cleaning this up today," he said, taking the broom I had been reaching for and beginning to sweep the shop floor.

"Oh…alright. I guess…I'll see you at supper then?" I asked awkwardly, earning a stiff nod from the man. I sighed and gave the man a thankful smile before leaving, glad that on some level he was being understanding and slightly considerate- even if it was geared more towards my wife than myself.

As I approached the farm I could hear some intelligible squealing from in the house, signaling that the kids were indeed here already. I let my shoulders slump and shook my head. This just didn't feel like a good idea. Not with Claire having felt the way she had been. I didn't know if it was because she was depressed or becoming ill, but she'd been sleeping a lot more recently.

She was just exhausted all the time, and I had been worried about the strain of her doing her regular work- let alone taking on more with the babysitting. And her mental health worried me to. She seemed fine, but after that episode where I had to hold the sobbing woman for an hour I had been leery about if watching those kids was doing more damage than good.

"I'm home," I called out as I entered the house, the familiar scent of grilled cheese sandwiches invading my senses. I took my jacket off and tossed it on the couch as I walked towards the kitchen. Claire was bent down, placing the cut up sandwich wedges on the tiny kids table were Kevin sat, and Rod was already digging into his, a sandwich quarter in each chubby fist as he squealed from his high chair.

"How was work?" Claire asked, standing up and then shaking her head slightly, a small smile on her face. I raised an eyebrow at her as I took off my hat.

"Fine. Honey are you alright?" I asked, concern lacing my voice. She looked paler than usual, and somewhat…distant.

"Oh I'm fine. Just…tired," she mumbled, turning and walking back to the kitchen. That had been her answer for three weeks now. Just tired.

"You need to go to the damn doctor about that," I muttered, pushing my hair back in frustration.

"Gray! Language," she chided as she opened the oven and pushed in the pan of prepared corn.

"You've been feeling that way for awhile and you're sleeping later and going to bed earlier." She closed the oven and went to stand, faltering some and gripping the oven handle. "Claire?" I called out, not sure what was wrong. I closed the distance in between us, pulling her up straight. I released her but she leaned somewhat limply against me, causing me to grip her shoulders. "What is it?" I demanded, no longer willing to buy the 'just tired' excuse.

"I…I'm not sure. I just felt dizzy all of a sudden," she murmured. I narrowed my eyes and scooped her legs out from under her. She let out an outraged squeal and it was echoed by that of Kevin who thought is was funny to watch me carry the woman. I carried her to the couch and sat her down, forcing her to lie.

"Stay there," I demanded sternly, just as the door opened.

"What is this about?" Grandpa chuckled, earning a glare from me and a blush from my wife.

"She isn't feeling all that well," I stated, standing up and making my way to the kitchen. I began pulling out the plates and setting the table, glancing over at Claire every so often to make sure she was still laying on the couch.

"Well did the doctor give you any medicine?" Gramps asked Claire, looking her over as if examining her himself.

"I haven't been to the doctor," Claire began, only to earn an all too familiar disapproving glare.

"And why not?"

"Because the stubborn woman won't go," I interjected, my tone boarding on annoyance and amusement. It was amazing that there were times when my wife could be just as stubborn as me.

"You're lucky you aren't my wife. I would have taken you kicking and screaming, thrown over my shoulder," he began to chide, and I could practically hear Claire's eye roll. I opted to stay in the kitchen, washing the dishes that were soiled and cleaning up Rod's high chair when he got done smearing what was left of his grilled cheese across the top of it.

I turned to go back to the kitchen when I tripped on something, causing me to stumble into the counter rather hard and I let out a choice curse when I slumped over it, hand coming to my tender gut. A sudden high pitched scream had me jerking my head back to behind me, seeing that it must have been a toddling Kevin I had tripped over. His high pitched scream caused Claire to jump up and she quickly took two steps towards us before hesitating, swaying slightly as her eyes became unfocused.

"Claire," I managed out, though it came out strained as I tried to stand up straight, my recently abused midsection protesting the movement.

"G-Gray…" she mumbled out, collapsing to her knees. Grandpa had caught her before she could fall all the way to the floor, and he looked down at her and then back to me as I forced my unwilling body to move into the living room.

"It's alright boy. She's just fainted I believe," he said calmly, doing his best at trying to keep me calm as well. Call me over dramatic but when my wife just randomly passes out for no apparent reason it freaks me out just a little bit. Who the hell just faints anymore? This isn't the 1800's.

"Can you watch these kids so I can take her to the clinic? Or at the least…" I mumbled, not sure if the kids would appreciate being left alone with such a scary looking guy they hardly knew. "take them back to Poultry Farm and tell their parents what happened."

"I'll take them back," he said warily, evidently thinking along the similar lines of what I was. "These rugrats don't know me and I'm not in the mood to sit here and listen to them scream until you get back."

I nodded at him, scooping up my wife bridal style, and frowning at how light she felt. I had a suspicion she had been losing some weight, but this was ridiculous. I had come to learn early on in our marriage that Claire didn't eat much when things bothered her. The last several months with her hope dwindling I had noticed her eating less and less. This fainting thing was probably from malnutrition.

"I'll come by and let you know what is going on after everything settles down," I mumbled, shifting Claire as I reached the door so I could open it. Grandpa picked up Rod and grabbed Kevin by the hand, leading him out the door as well.

" Don't worry about it…If you need to come in late tomorrow I'll understand," he muttered out, visibly wincing when Rod yanked on his beard. I gave him a curt nod before making my way out of the farm and walking as fast as I could towards the clinic. I kept glancing down at Claire, hoping she would wake up, but it seemed she wasn't coming too any time soon.

"You need to start taking better care of yourself," I muttered darkly as I passed the library, a relieved sigh leaving me as I saw the clinic come into view. I didn't expect a reply from the unconscious woman, but I did think back to something I had read once since we'd been trying to conceive. Claire needed to be healthy at her age, otherwise her body wouldn't be able to handle a pregnancy.

"Hey Doc," I called as I entered the clinic, hoping that Elli didn't mind her Mother's Day being slightly over crowded. She was sitting at her desk, little Sonya in a play pen next to her. She girl squealed when she saw me, raising her arms up in a gesture to be picked up. "Sorry Sonya, my hands are full right now," I managed out, taking Claire into the side room, Elli trailing in after me, clip board in hand.

"What happened?" she questioned as I laid Claire in the bed.

"She's been sleeping a lot- fatigued. Tired all the time. Then today she was feeling dizzy. She stood up quick and fainted," I mumbled, taking my hat off and twisting it nervously. Elli nodded and grabbed some pillows from the other bed, lifting Claire's feet and putting them on it.

"When ever someone passes out like that, it's best to elevate there feet so proper blood flow returns to the head," she explained as Tim walked in, and she moved out of the way so he could begin his examination. Tim poked and prodded at Claire, checking her blood pressure and her heart rate and all the normal things he did when I found her passed out in her field. But this time something was different.

"Gray…we're going to do some blood work on her."

"You aren't sticking me with any needles," came a weary voice from the bed. I shook my head and walked up closer to her, ruffling her hair and leaning down.

"You just collapsed in the house for no apparent reason. If I have to pin you down they're taking the test the need to find out how to make you better."

"But there is nothing wrong with me," she began to protest, which only resulted in my covering her mouth with my hand.

"When it comes to your well being, you will never win that argument with me," I said firmly, not moving my hand until her muffled protest silenced. Needless to say Tim got his blood sample, be it willingly or not.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

"I want to go home," Claire repeated for what seemed like the hundredth time in the last hour. I stood up from my chair, really wanting to leave this place myself. That had to be the most uncomfortable chair in the world.

"Are you still feeling dizzy?" I asked, ignoring her complaint all together.

"I'm feeling extremely agitated and am seriously considering consulting a divorcee attorney," she snapped back, kicking the hospital sheet off of her in frustration. I turned around, scowling at her and clearly not amused with her comment.

"Am I interrupting something?"

I turned to Tim, slightly relived that he had come in. I was in no mood to explain to my wife that her contemplating divorcee because I was concerned about her health was just ludicrous.

"No. Claire just wants to go back home," I said, reaching up to pull my hat brim down only to realize it was still sitting on the edge of Claire's hospital bed.

"Well everything came back alright. She'll be free as soon as you two sign all the paper work and pick up some prescriptions," he chuckled, looking down at his clip board and shaking his head. "You finally proved me wrong, didn't you?"

I blinked at the older man, somewhat confused, and evidently my face showed it since he rolled his eyes and stepped into the room, sitting on his stool and smiling down at Claire.

"You're a very lucky woman you know. A lot of women would love to have the symptoms that you do." It was Claire's turn to blink at him with confusion. He chuckled some and handed her his clip board, flipping the first page and pointing at something. Claire looked at whatever was written there, her eyes widening and one of her hands coming up to her mouth.

"Oh…Gray," she whispered, her eyes not leaving the chart. I felt my stomach tightening, not exactly positive if whatever was on there was good or not. I released a breath I didn't realize I had been holding when she finally smiled at me, and hesitantly walked up to her. Claire handed Tim back the chart, her hands coming to scrub furiously at her face.

"Why…why are you crying?" I said, slightly panicked, squatting down next to the bed and trying to remain as calm as I could considering my wife seemed to be having a nervous breakdown at the moment.

"She's pregnant," Tim stated quietly, slapping my back as he laughed. I stared at the crisp white sheet of the clinic bed for a moment or so, the information sinking in and still not quite registering. I looked up at Claire, who was beaming brightly at me, evidently waiting for my reaction. I gave her a weak smile before turning back to Tim.

"But…why did she pass out? I mean…don't women usually just throw up?" I muttered out, confused as to how a fainting spell could be diagnosed as a pregnancy. "Is…is something wrong?" I asked, rubbing the back of my neck nervously. What if this was going to be a normal occurrence? Was she was going to have complications like this the whole nine months?

"Her blood circulation is altering itself, as the uterus needs more as it grows with the baby. As long as she takes her time getting up and does it slowly she shouldn't pass out. If she does you just need to lay her down and elevate her legs," he began explaining and I shook my head, scowling at the floor.

"But if she falls it can hurt the baby," I muttered under my breath, rubbing my hand over my face in agitation. "And the fatigue?"

"That should actually not last too much longer. After the first trimester she'll probably be over energized," Tim continued to explain as I sat on the edge of the bed and slumped slightly. I glanced over to my wife, her happiness from a few moments ago absent. She was looking at me with a hurt and worried expression on her face.

"Is she…is she going to have problems?" I asked, turning back to Tim. He raised his eyebrows and looked over at Claire and then back to me before answering.

"Her physical condition could be better, but I feel that with a healthier and more nutritional diet than her current one, and the prenatal vitamins and care, as well as bi-weekly check ups, she should have a healthy and relatively normal pregnancy." Tim finished and wheeled his stool closer to Claire. He grabbed her hand and patted it, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.

"You are going to have to be extra careful now, and not do some of the things that farm work requires," he began to explain. I watched them out of the corner of my eye, grateful that Tim thought to explain this to her. Claire nodded and reached out, gently tugging on my arm.

"You're mad about this, aren't you?" she asked quietly, her eyes falling to her lap. I opened my mouth to speak, thought better of it and shook my head.

"No…I'm not. I just…" I stopped, unable to find the words I wanted to say.

"He's more concerned about your health," Tim offered, and I nodded, giving him a grateful smile.

"I don't want anything to happen to you, or the baby," I added quietly, moving more up the bed and pulling her into a hug, my chin resting on her head. I smiled bitterly into her hair and shook my head. "I've read so much about what can go wrong…I just…" I stopped talking and held her tightly, my eyes shutting as I tried to will myself to be calm. I heard Tim's shoes on the tile floor as he left the room, leaving us alone.

"Gray," Claire began, but I simply squeezed her tighter, hearing her let out a groan before I loosened my grip.

"I don't want to lose you. Either of you," I muttered into her hair, feeling her small arms circle around my torso, her hands rubbing my back soothingly.

"Don't think like that, alright?" She murmured out finally, breath brushing over my neck. I let out a sigh at the suggestion, but she continued on. "This is supposed to be a very happy moment. And so help me I will have your grandfather beat you if you don't give me at least one smile."

I couldn't stop myself from chuckling at that, pulling back some and doing my best to give her a smile. I let my gaze flicker from her face and down to her belly, and I could feel my smile falter.

"What…what if they don't like me?" I muttered out, scratching my head as my wife just rolled her eyes.

"Goddess, Gray, I'm fairly sure your own flesh and blood will like you on some level," she muttered out, huffing and crossing her arms over her chest. "I don't call you being this insecure before we were married."

"I was," I said truthfully, my fingers reaching out to graze over her lower tummy. There…was life in there, huh? I wonder when it would move around and we could feel it. "I just didn't tell you about it." I pressed my hand flat against her belly, a sudden giddiness filling me as I pressed my lips against hers for a moment. "Happy Mother's Day," I mumbled out, chuckling when her face flushed as she registered the words. She giggled some and nodded her head, one arm wrapping around my neck and pulling me closer so she could kiss me again.

"So it is…" she mumbled against my lips.

So it was.


	3. Chapter 3

How goddamn long does it take to have a baby anyway?

I know good and well that we had been in the clinic for several hours before I was booted out here into the streets like I was a goddamn liability. So maybe I had hurled that no good doctor up against the clinic wall, he damn sure had deserved it. My wife was in pain, and she was panicking, which in turn made me panic. And that only intensified when the word 'complications' and some other term I can't recall made my wife begin crying tears of frustration. So maybe I was a little over the top when I demanded that doctor do his fucking job and birth me a baby, but for Goddess sake what the hell else could I do?

I was utterly helpless, my wife was in pain, and now I couldn't even be in there to offer her my hand to squeeze. I kicked the bench I had dragged from the supermarket to the clinic and continued to pace back and forth in front the clinic walkway, every now and then stopping when I could hear a rather loud scream. It was killing me on the inside, especially since every so often I was positive I could make out my name in those pained wails.

I'd lost track of how many times I'd started beating on the clinic door and demanded to be let back in, and my hands were stiff and most likely bruised from the repeated attempts at getting back inside. I finally sat down on the bench, slouching over and clasping my tender hands together. What the hell could it hurt.

"Hey…look…I know…I'm not a religious man by any means. But Carter says that the Harvest Goddess is supposed to compassionate. So…if you could find it to end Claire's suffering in there, I would be greatly obliged. I just want her to have the baby and for her to come home with me," I continued on, pausing when a shrill scream reached my ears, and I winced some. "And for Goddess sake I want her to stop screaming," I added under my breath, and I could almost swear I heard a damn giggle at that in my head.

It stayed there, staring at the ground for a very long time. It eventually occurred to me that I hadn't heard any screams or cries in the last twenty minutes, and yet…no one had come outside to let me know anything. Exactly what the hell was going on inside of there?

I jumped up when I heard the lock clicking on the other side, the door opening excruciatingly slowly to reveal my grandfather. He gave me a weak smile and beckoned me to the door, and I followed like a little puppy that had been scolded before being allowed back into the house. I was at least thankful that he had been in here, even if he hadn't been in the delivery room. He had at least been in the waiting room. As I approached the door I realized that I couldn't hear anything on the other side. Shouldn't the baby be crying or something?

"Is the baby alright?" I asked quietly, my arms stiff at my sides and feeling a bit like led at the moment. Grandpa gave me a hesitant nod and met my eyes.

"The baby is fine," he began and I automatically interrupted him, relief filling me and making me feel that certain questions that were often asked by new fathers in the movies.

"What is it?" I murmured anxiously, unable to stop the elated grin from spreading over my face. The baby was alright, everything was fine. It was all going to be okay.

"A girl. She's beautiful, just like her mother," he began, his grin mirroring my own, before faltering slightly.

"A girl," I echoed, my eyes shutting as I took in the information. I had a daughter. I laughed some, in relief and excitement. Hands coming up to clasp my grandfather's shoulders. "I have a daughter," I chuckled, shaking my head and grinning all the more. "How is Claire? What does she think about her?" I began, only to stop when saw Grandpa's gaze faltering off to the side. I blinked at him, thoroughly confused.

"Gray…you…you need to talk to the doctor first. There were complications," there was that damn word again, and my chest tightened painfully, each beat of my heart painful and seemingly forced. "…as far as I know everything is fine _now._"

That being said and him being my grandfather he knew to move out of the way before I pushed somewhat frantically past him and into the clinic. Tim was standing off to the side, removing his scrubs that were covered with…blood. I felt my face pale as he turned to me, and his reassuring smile calmed me if only slightly. He opened his mouth and before he could speak I blurted out

"What complications?" He blinked at me and nodded his head, taking a deep breath as he gathered his words.

"Your daughter had her umbilical cord wrapped around her neck, but is fine. When you were removed from the delivery room it was because the baby's heart pattern changed. But we had Claire changed position and it helped with that. However…" he began, slightly hesitant as he placed the last of his scrubs in the plastic container and closed the lid. "…after the actual birth is was rather difficult to stop Claire from bleeding." He looked at me and shook his head tiredly, his hair falling into his eyes now that it was free of that stupid hat thing. "We finally got her stable, and she's exhausted. We'll have to keep her here a few extra days to make sure she doesn't start bleeding again," he explained

"Thank Goddess," I mumbled out, once again able to breathe normally and the tightness in my chest loosened slightly. "Thank you," I managed out, unable to stop myself from hugging the other man, patting his back roughly. "Thank you for everything," I mumbled before stepping back, looking over to the hospital room that Claire had been in. "Can I see her?"

"Claire is sleeping right now. She's understandably worn out. But there is another young lady here wanting to meet at least one of her parents," Elli's voice chimed in as she grabbed my hand, leading me over to the door of Claire's room and holding her index finger over her lips in a gesture to tell me to remain quiet.

When we entered the room, my eyes landed on my sleeping wife, noting how deathly pale she looked and just how exhausted as well. I silently made my way to her, pushing her slightly dampened bangs back and pressing my lips to her forehead. I wanted to tell her I was sorry I wasn't here the whole time, but it damn sure hadn't been my fault. I put up a decent fight when they took me out!

"Gray, this is your daughter," Elli whispered, holding what appeared to be a bundle of blankets to her and handing them out to me. She shook her head when I held my arms out, maneuvering the bundle and showing me the proper way to hold an infant. "Mind her head now," she warned, and once she was happy with the way I was holding her, she nodded and stepped out of the room. I stared down at the bundle of blankets, seeing that the baby's face covered and shook my head.

"So you're what all the fuss is about now?" I mumbled lowly, shifting so I had a free hand. "Your mother has wanted you for a very long time you know," I added thoughtfully, my large callused fingers brushing over the soft blanket, hesitating. "To tell you the truth I've been kind of waiting on you too," I mumbled, pushing the blanket back to reveal the infant.

Her small nose was slanted slightly upward, a crown of strawberry blond fluff just barely covered the very top of her head, and despite the pudgy cheeks I could already make out Claire's facial features on the baby. I brushed my fingertips over the baby's cheek, slightly awed by the wrapped bundle of the insanely tiny person. A small pudgy fist slipped out of the loosened blankets, brushing over the side of my hand. The contact seemed to alert the infant to my presence and she slowly opened her eyes, mouth opening in a wide yawn. I stared into a pair of familiar eyes as she blinked tiredly up at me.

"She's got your eyes," Grandpa murmured, causing me to look over my shoulder as I hadn't exactly heard the old man sneak up behind me.

"She's just…perfect," I said quietly, turning towards Grandpa completely and catching sight of my wife in the bed. Her eyes were half lidded and she looked exhausted, but she offered me a smile and beckoned me closer.

"Not even an hour old and she has you wrapped around her finger," Claire mumbled out, her hand resting on my forearm and pulling me more towards her, her face curiously trying to look into the bundle. I kneeled down so she could see the baby, and I don't think I had ever seen Claire smile so brightly. "Oh Gray…she looks like you," she mumbled, and I raised an eyebrow, shaking my head and chuckling.

"No…she looks like you," I corrected, and I could hear my grandfather chuckle in the background.

"Let's end this with she's a healthy mix of the both of you, hmm?" he offered, leaning over me to stare down at the baby. "I've such a beautiful great- granddaughter. I'll have to work hard till I can see her in a wedding dress too," he said, ruffling my hair- seeing as how when Claire went into labor in the wee hours of the morning I had forgotten to put it on.

I grimaced at his statement, the idea of loosing my new daughter to someone else so soon somewhat unnerving.

"Now its to early to be thinking like that," Claire mumbled, her eyes shutting and staying that way for a few moments before she opened them again, trying her best to fight sleep.

"Do you want to hold her?" I asked quietly, trying to awkwardly offer the baby to her mother. Claire shook her head, and mumbled out

"I'd love to, but I'm afraid I'm to tired to even do that." I looked between my wife and my daughter, and I stood slowly, walking around to the other side of the bed where there was more room and slipping into the bed next to Claire, resting the baby down in my lap so she could see her better. Claire's small hand brushed over the baby's cheek and she gave out a small gasp when her finger was caught by the pudgy hand. I chuckled some at her reaction, shifting so I could wrap my free arm around her.

"Did you name her yet?" I asked quietly, watching as our baby closed her tired eyes, her head drooping more into the fluffy blanket. Claire licked her chapped lips and rested more into her pillows, her finger still encased by the tiny hand.

"I like the name Kenzie," she said quietly, her gaze shifting towards me to see what I thought. I grinned down at her, nodding my head.

"I like that…Kenzie," I said the name myself, my free arm pulling my wife closer to me so I cold drop a kiss on top of her head. Claire chuckled herself, moving her head to press her own lips to my jaw before turning her attention back to the new addition to our family.

"It means…descendent of the handsome man," she said quietly. I heard my grandfather start laughing before the words fully registered in my head, and at that moment I felt my face heat uncontrollably.

"Woman…why would you want to stick our kid with a name like that?" I muttered out, shaking my head in an attempt to try to fight off the flustered look I no doubt had on my face.

"So she'll know that no matter how much I cursed her father's name while bringing her into this world, that I still thought him a handsome man," she said teasingly, eyes shutting as her head fell against my shoulder, finally losing her battle with sleep. I chuckled some and leaned my head against hers, my eyes shutting contently.

"I suppose that is a good reason. Just don't…tell her that till she's a lot older," I mumbled, staring between the sleeping baby and her mother.

It might have taken a damn long time. But seeing the baby in my arms…

It was worth it.


End file.
